A fox who lived in the deep forest of long ago had lost its front legs. No one knew how: perhaps escaping from a trap. A man who lived on the edge of the forest , seeing the fox from time to time, wondered how in the world it managed to get its food. One day when the fox was not far from him he had to hide himself quickly because a tiger was approaching. The tiger had fresh game in its claws. Lying down on the ground, it ate its fill, leaving the rest for the fox.
Again the next day the great Provider of this world sent provisions to the fox by this same tiger. The man began to think: “If this fox is taken care of in this mysterious way, its food sent by some unseen Higher Power, why don’t I just rest in a corner and have my daily meal provided for me?”
Because he had a lot of faith, he let the days pass, waiting for food. Nothing happened. He just went on losing weight and strength until he was nearly a skeleton. Close to losing consciousness, he heard a Voice which said: “O you, who have mistaken the way, see now the Truth! You should have followed the example of that tiger instead of imitating the disabled fox.”
.s e l i t j o k e r
.3 quotes daily HERE
LAW OF QUEUE:
If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
LAW OF TELEPHONE:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.
LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
LAW OF THE WORKSHOP:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
LAW OF THE ALIBI:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre,the next morning you will have a flat tyre.
When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.
LAW OF ENCOUNTERS:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.
LAW OF THE RESULT:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will!
LAW OF BIOMECHANICS:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
People with the seats at front arrive last.
LAW OF COFFEE:
As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
.s e l i t j o k e r
.3 quotes daily HERE
There was once a small boy who banged a drum all day and loved every moment of it. He would not be quiet, no matter what anyone else said or did. Various people who called themselves Sufis, and other well-wishers, were called in by neighbors and asked to do something about the child.
The first so-called Sufi told the boy that he would, if he continued to make so much noise, perforate his eardrums; this reasoning was too advanced for the child, who was neither a scientist nor a scholar.
The second told him that drum beating was a sacred activity and should be carried out only on special occasions.
The third offered the neighbors plugs for their ears; the fourth gave the boy a book; the fifth gave the neighbors books that described a method of controlling anger through biofeedback; the sixth gave the boy meditation exercises to make him placid and explained that all reality was imagination.
Like all placebos, each of these remedies worked for a short while, but none worked for very long.
Eventually, a real Sufi came along. He looked at the situation, handed the boy a hammer and chisel, and said, “I wonder what is INSIDE the drum?”
An old Cherokee Indian was speaking to his grandson:
“A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil–he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good — he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a long minute, and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
While a man was polishing his new car, his 4 yr old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car. In anger, the man took the child’s hand and hit it many times not realizing he was using a wrench. At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.
When the child saw his father… with painful eyes he asked, ‘Dad when will my fingers grow back?’
The man was so hurt and speechless; he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times, devastated by his own actions.
Sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches; the child had written ‘LOVE YOU DAD’.
The next day that man committed suicide. . .
Anger and Love have no limits; choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely life & remember this: Things are to be used and people are to be loved . The problem in today’s world is that people are used while things are loved.
Let’s try always to keep this thought in mind: Things are to be used, People are to be loved.
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits they become character;
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
An elderly man in Mumbai calls his son in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce. 35 years of marriage… and that much misery is enough!”
“Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams.
“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer.” the old man says.
“We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!”
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
“Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, ‘I’ll take care of this.”
She calls Mumbai immediately, and screams at the old man, “You are not getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR??” and she hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay”, he says, “It’s all set. They’re both coming for Deepavali and paying their own airfare!!”
MORAL OF THE STORY?
No man / woman is busy in this world all 365 days.
The sky is not going to fall down if you take few days LEAVE and meet your dear ones and family.
1.Coca-Cola was originally green.
2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
3. The name of all the continents ends with the same letter that they start with.
4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States .
6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
8. You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath ..
9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.
10. People say “Bless you” when you sneeze because when you Sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.
11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
12. The “sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.
13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to Suppress a sneeze; you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.
14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king from History. “Spades” – King David; “Clubs” – Alexander the Great; ” Hearts” – Charlemagne; “Diamonds” – Julius Caesar.
11 x 11=121
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987, 654,321
16. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
17. What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common? Ans. – All invented by women.
18. Honey – This is the only food that doesn’t spoil.
19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
20. A snail can sleep for three years.
21. All polar bears are left handed.
22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.
23. Butterflies taste with their feet.
24. Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.
25. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.
26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
27. Shakespeare invented the word ‘assassination’ and ‘bump’.
28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
36. Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different
Pada suatu hari, ada seseorang menangkap burung. Burung itu berkata kepadanya, “Aku tak berguna bagimu sebagai tawanan. Lepaskan saja aku. Nanti aku beri kau tiga nasihat.”
Si burung berjanji akan memberikan nasihat pertama ketika berada dalam genggaman orang itu. Yang kedua akan diberikannya kalau ia sudah berada di cabang pohon dan yang ketiga ketika ia sudah mencapai puncak bukit.
Orang itu setuju, lalu ia meminta nasihat pertama. Kata burung itu, “Kalau kau kehilangan sesuatu, meskipun engkau menghargainya seperti hidupmu sendiri, jangan menyesal.”
Orang itu pun melepaskannya dan burung itu segera melompat ke dahan. Disampaikannya nasihat yang kedua, “Jangan percaya kepada segala yang bertentangan dengan akal, apabila tak ada bukti.”
Kemudian burung itu terbang ke puncak gunung. Dari sana ia berkata, “Wahai manusia malang! Dalam diriku terdapat dua permata besar, kalau saja tadi kau membunuhku, kau akan memperolehnya.” Orang itu sangat menyesal memikirkan kehilangannya, namun katanya, “setidaknya, katakan padaku nasihat yang ketiga itu!”
Si burung menjawab, “Alangkah bodohnya kau meminta nasihat ketiga sedangkan yang kedua pun belum kau renungkan sama sekali. Sudah kukatakan pada kau agar jangan kecewa kalau kehilangan dan jangan mempercayai hal yang bertentangan dengan akal. Kini kau malah melakukan keduanya. Kau percaya pada hal yang tak masuk akal dan menyesali kehilanganmu. Aku pun tidak cukup besar untuk menyimpan dua permata besar! Kau khayal dalam kebodohan! Oleh karenanya kau harus tetap berada dalam keterbatasan yang disediakan bagi manusia…”
Peristiwa ini berlaku di Baitulmaqdis, di mana ada seorang wanita tua yang sangat rajin beribadat, terutamanya bila tiba bulan rejab.
Di bulan ini dia akan membaca surah al-Ikhlas sebanyak 12 kali di samping mengerjakan ibadah puasa. Di bulan ini juga dia akan menanggalkan segala pakaian mewah dan digantikan dengan pakaian biasa.
Pada suatu hari dia jatuh sakit dan merasakan ajalnya hampir tiba, lalu dia pun meninggalkan wasiat kepada anak lelakinya. Katanya, “Anakku, sekiranya aku mati kapankanlah aku dengan kain yang murah.”
Setelah ajalnya tiba, lalu diuruskan jenazahnya itu oleh anaknya. Tapi kerana mahu menjaga maruah keluarga, anak lelakinya itu telah mengkafankan ibunya dengan kain yang mahal. Pada malam itu, dia bermimpi bertemu dengan ibunya. Kata ibunya, “Kenapa engkau tidak melaksanakan wasiatku dulu? Aku tidak rela dengan kain yang mahal ini.”
Setelah terkejut dari tidur, anaknya merasa menyesal lalu membuat keputusan untuk menggali semula kubur ibunya. Setelah digali sedalam yang mungkin, namun dia masih tidak berjumpa dengan mayat ibunya. Akhirnya dia pulang.
Pada malam itu dia bermimpi lagi. Ada suara yang berkata, “Sesiapa yang memuliakan bulan rejab, maka Allah tidak akan membiarkannya bersendirian di dalam kubur”.
Bila tersedar, dia berasa amat hairan namun bersyukur kerana ibunya telah mendapat perhatian di sisi Allah di atas kelebihan serta amalan ibunya di bulan Rejab.
In ancient times, a king had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock.
Some of the king’s wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the big stone out of the way.
Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. On approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. As the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the king indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway.
The peasant learned what many others never understand.